Zoo Sweat, Superediting, And–Oh Look! A Poll!

I took Baby Girl to the zoo yesterday. She is currently on quite an animal kick, so I knew she would have a blast, PLUS, it was not her first time at the zoo and I know from experience that she is a ZOO FANATIC.

I wanted to be at the gate right when it opened, but of course the Nap Demons visited and we didn’t make it there until a good two hours later.

At which point the heat had reached roughly 845 degrees.

Undaunted, we entered the zoo with high spirits. Baby Girl made growling noises at all the animals. We avoided a particularly surly looking llama in the petting zoo.

We saw the African Elephant (or “el-pant!” according to Baby Girl) and alllllmost rode the train, but the line was too long and the temperature had soared to 1,362 degrees, so we bailed and went home.

As we drove along, I had a startling revelation. I smelled like ZOO SWEAT.

If you’re unfamiliar with zoo sweat, it is a whole different category of sweat. It’s thick, and grimy, and tainted with the distinct odor of giraffes.

It is, to use the technical term, NAST-OLA.

(And y’all, this poor woman in the train line with us was not from Alabama, and I swear she and her children were just about to melt right there in front of me. “I don’t know what to do with this heat,” she said.)

(Hopefully she doesn’t know what happens later this week.)

(Yikes.)

Some of you are saying, “Dude, it’s WAY hotter than that where I live.” And I’m sure that’s true. But you probably live out west, where there is no humidity and your hair doesn’t do this the moment you step outside:

So when they say 106 degrees, that means it will feel more like 115 degrees. Maybe 120. AndΒ I will be KEEPING MY DISTANCE from the zoo that day, thankyouverymuch.

IN OTHER NEWS:

I’ve begun work on some beta edits for PULL, the last round of revisions before I send the manuscript back to Agent Emma. It’s going well, I just need to read through the whole thing one more time, making changes as I go, and then send it off to her.

While also revising THE CLEARING / SHADOWS OF THE HIDDEN. Which, um, comes out in DECEMBER.

AND *crazy laughter* GUESS WHAT ELSE comes out in December? That anthology! WINTER WONDER! The one with the short story by me, that I have not yet written.

Hahaha. HA HA HA HA HA *headdesk*

Anyway.

Okay, and then LASTLY, I have a POLL for you!

So, when people find out I’m a Christian, they…tend to have a lot of questions. Which is GREAT. Seriously. I like talking about it, and frankly, it irritates me to no end that a handful of dingbats out there have given all of us a bad name.

Several friends of mine have asked if I ever plan to do a big post about my faith. I’ve done some small ones, but I’ve never felt confident about doing a thorough one because A) I’m not sure people care, B) I am, honestly, terrified that some people will go into it with their Judgey Eyes on and call me names, and C) I don’t know where to start. It’s…kind of a big topic.

My poll today is simply for you to tell me if you would be interested in something like this. If I were to do it, I’d probably take questions via email, choose four or five to answer, and post the Q&A here on the blog.

My only caveat is that I’d like to stay away from hotbutton political issues, simply because I don’t want people ripping each other’s heads off in my comment section, know what I mean?

So we’d stick to things like, “Hey Anne! Why do you believe in God if bad things happen?” or, “Hey Anne! Why do you believe in heaven and hell?” or the ever-popular, “Hey Anne! If you’re a Christian, why don’t you write Christian fiction?”

Okay. So. What do you think? It won’t hurt my feelings at all if people aren’t interested; I just want to know if I should do this or not.

[poll id=”10″]

YAY. Okay, thanks for reading and polling and zoo sweating. See you next time!

 

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12 thoughts on “Zoo Sweat, Superediting, And–Oh Look! A Poll!

  1. Anna Duffey says:

    We were totally at the zoo yesterday too. And as someone who somehow miraculously made it there within 15 minutes of the opening of the gates… don’t feel bad — it’s was still hot as all get out, AND all of the animals were apparently telling the trainers/zookeepers “5 more minutes” or something because seriously.., none of them were awake and most of them weren’t even in their enclosures.

    • Anne Riley says:

      HA. Well, that’s good to know. What’s the point of getting to the zoo early if the animals are slacking?

  2. TheDrunch says:

    Sure, why not! If it’s something important that you need to say, then say it. Whatever the topic. That’s the fun of a blog. It’s really all about YOU!

    Also, 1200 words into my NEW short story for the anthology…and I have no idea what comes next. Awesome.

  3. Heather McCorkle says:

    LOL! Zoo sweat, oh yeah that is some nasty stuff. Where I live (high desert) it’s 0 humidity so that’s a whole different monster in itself. Without a ton of lotion (and I mean a ton) year round, I look like a crocodile.

    • Anne Riley says:

      Ooooh I bet that is true! I guess the humidity does keep us all moisturized, but dang, at what cost??

  4. Dana Elmendorf says:

    I’m not sure what cracked me up more: Llama angry, Zoo Sweat or “Not Okay” weather note. You’re so funny. I’m leaving my beautiful, non-humidity southern California for thick as shower steam air of Tennessee. Not to mention our record breaking three digit temps this week. Yay me…

    • Anne Riley says:

      Tennessee is a bit better than Alabama on the weather front, but still, you’re right… it’ll be a sauna. Sorry πŸ™

  5. Connie Keller says:

    We went to the zoo in Memphis once when it was 107. Yeah, totally insane, but it was free that day for Tennessee residents–clearly the only people crazy enough to go to the zoo when it was going to be sooo hot.

    We spent a lot of time in the air conditioned polar bear exhibit. πŸ™‚

    • Anne Riley says:

      Dude, Memphis legitimately might be the hottest city on earth. I immediately start sweating when I think about that place.

  6. Ansley says:

    You know it’s hot when you start showering like you’re in Thailand….3 times/day. For real, this heat is crazy. Plus, I have no AC in my car, so it’s a double sauna (which is WAY less cool than a double rainbow, in case you were wondering).

    P.S. You looked fab at church. Way to rock a pregnancy, yo!

    • Anne Riley says:

      NO AC? Oh. No, nonononono. That should be illegal. And thanks dude, I feel like a whale, so that is good to hear πŸ™‚

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