Yeah, My Pants Are On Fire

Man – y’all had some great guesses as to which of my claims on this post were lies, and which ones were true! Apparently I am a freaking AWESOME liar, because some people who know me in real life actually missed a couple!

Is it a good thing to be an awesome liar? Hmm. Maybe I should be a spy or something. Put my talents to use.

Anyway, are you ready for the answers? Here we go!

Claim #1: I know how to bellydance. TRUE! Haha! I have taken two classes from a woman named Aziza, and I do have a jingly skirt. It’s pretty much the funniest thing you’ve ever seen because I’m really awkward and uncoordinated, but I can do it. If I’m forced. (No, there are no pictures or videos, so don’t even ask.)

Claim #2: My shoe once caught fire at a barbecue in London. TRUE! It happened exactly as I described. My sandal wasn’t flaming up or anything, but part of it did catch fire and my foot did get burned. I spent the following 15 minutes in this guy’s bathroom with my foot in his tub while cold water ran over it. Good times.

Claim #3: I almost drowned in a riptide in Florida. FALSE! While I’ve done many a stupid thing involving the ocean, I have never been moronic enough to ignore those flags.

Claim #4: I used to have a pet squirrel. TRUE! And because some of you didn’t believe me, I brought proof:

Yay! That’s Chester!

Claim #5: I made a guest appearance on the reality TV show “Two-A-Days.” FALSE! But, it was a real show, sadly. I tried to find some video of it, but for some reason (she said sarcastically) there’s not much to be found. I did, however, find this:

Claim #6: I’m an award-winning water skier. FALSE! I can’t even get up on water skis for more than 5 seconds, but I have a good friend who was on the UA Waterski Team. And, for Jemi, who couldn’t imagine having a waterski team at all:

Spring ’08 from Ski Bama on Vimeo.

Claim #7: When I was little, I made up my own language. TRUE! But y’all were all over that one. I guess it’s not uncommon, eh?

So there you have it. The truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth. Thanks for playing!

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14 thoughts on “Yeah, My Pants Are On Fire

  1. Anne Riley says:

    DL: Hopefully that is a good dang!

    Eisley: Yeah, in retrospect, Chester probably wasn't the most sanitary pet. But I never caught anything weird. *scratches frantically behind ears*

    Harley: Yeah girl! We all did it, didn't we?

    Frankie: I don't know about videos. And I can't remember what kind of dance it was… it was a couple years ago that I stopped.

    Lorel: Yeah, he was pretty cute!

  2. Jemi Fraser says:

    Thanks for the video! I'm so sending my kids to school where you live! My son would loooooove this 🙂 There's a lot of talent on that video!

    I like squirrels, but still don't want one sleeping on my neck!

  3. Jamey Stegmaier says:

    I want to know everything about Chester. How did you adopt him? Was he cuddly? Where did he sleep? Why don't you still have him? Did he play with other animals? He's adorable!

    Also, I can completely relate about the water skis. I have tried on multiple occasions to water ski and wakeboard, and I just can't do it. Mind you, a toddler can wakeboard. My cat could probably wakeboard. It's that easy. But it's like my body isn't built to do that. My body is built to sit in the boat and have a beer while someone else is dragged behind us.

  4. Heather says:

    You're GOOD. I totally thought #3 was true! You can belly dance, sweet! And the pet squirrel, totally awesome. The most exotic pet I've ever had was a salamander 😉

  5. Anne Riley says:

    Jemi: I don't blame you – it is a rodent, after all! Now I have a larger rodent called a cat. She refuses to touch me.

    Medeia: Thanks for guessing! Glad you stopped by!

    Heather: Hey, salamanders are super cool!

  6. Anne Riley says:

    Jamey: Chester fell out of a tree when he was little. We took him in before anything could eat him. Yes, he was very cuddly. He liked to sleep in our laps or sometimes he would curl up on our shoulders. Mostly, he slept in a shoebox. We did not let him play with the other pets, because they were all cats and they wanted to eat him. We don't have him anymore because he hit puberty and started being kind of mean, and then he bit my dad. So Chester went to live with this girl who takes in squirrels. She had like 15 squirrels. It was kind of weird.

    And yes, I am also made to sit in the boat and drink something while somebody else hangs on to that rope!

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